I’ve been married for 10 1/2 whole months. So obviously, I know everything there is to know about marriage. So for all you newbies out there, pull up a chair and listen to the wisdom that I am about to throw down.

1) First and foremost, she’s weird. She doesn’t keep the toothpaste canister clean. She’s anal about the shower curtain being closed. She will be fine with the way the house looks until the second she hears company MIGHT be stopping by and then suddenly we live in the dirtiest house in the world. She steals my pillow and my covers nightly. She’s just weird! I’m sure there is nothing about me that’s weird to her.

2) Saying, “I don’t care babe, you can pick” is NOT you being nice and letting your wife decide. It’s you being an $&# and making your wife decide. If my wife asks me what I want for dinner, I better have an answer. This is serious stuff.

2) Hiding from your spouse is a lot of fun. Amy goes to bed pretty early, so when she’s getting ready for bed, I like to turn off all the lights and construct a complex scene of fake-outs and hide somewhere. I will put pillows under the covers to make it look I am there and jump out from the closet. I will pretty much do whatever I can to make her say, “Baby, I hate this…please come out.”

4) Marriage helps with money accountability. We both have smart phones, so that means we both can instantly access our bank account. So if I decide to buy the new PS3 NCAA football game you better believe Amy is going to know about it! It makes us ask the question, “Do I really need this?” Sure there are times when we blow some money, but having someone to ask if that purchase was necessary or not really helps. (As long as you have both agreed to be asked that question.)

5) Your wife is pregnant? This is really an entirely different blog post, but be prepared to wash more dishes, do more laundry, give out 50% more back rubs and hear, “Get away from me” at least 15 times a day. (Especially if you like to pester your wife like I do.)

6) It’s really easy to neglect praying together. We got to bed at different times and wake up at different times. It’s so easy to put off praying together. We have to be very intentional about this.

7) Intimacy comes in many different ways. We are a team. When we cook and clean the kitchen together I feel it. When we discuss our week and what we are going to do, I feel it. When we pray, I feel it. When we laugh, I feel it. Intimacy comes in many different ways.

Just because these are things that I have learned doesn’t mean we are perfect at them. We aren’t, but we are trying to get better each day. I am so thankful for Amy and the last 10 1/2 months. It’s been so much fun and I can’t wait to start our family and continue down this journey of life with her. She’s awesome and scared of the dark. Can’t ask for much more.

I was going through some files on my computer and I stumbled upon one called, “Journal.”  I thought it was strange since I don’t keep a formal journal, so I clicked on it.  It was a letter that I wrote to myself almost a year ago when I was going through a rough time. I barely remember writing it, but reading it broke me.  What an amazing reminder of what can happen when you are committed to letting God write your story.

Dear Wes,

I wanted to write you this letter to remind you of some things.  I don’t know where you are in life or what challenges and surprises have come your way, but I do know how you got there.  [..]

This morning (Tuesday, July 13th) I woke up at 3:30AM and headed to the airport to start my journey to the Dominican Republic.  I am leading a team from Cross Point to work on a church and feeding center that was started there 3 years ago.  The finishing touches will hopefully happen this week.  I think it’s pretty cool that us finishing the buildings doesn’t begin a ministry.  The ministry has been going on for years already and I can’t wait to hear the wisdom of the men and women who have dedicated their life to reaching the lost in the D.R.

Someone asked me Sunday night how they could specifically pray for me.  I responded with, “Pray that my life is ruined.  Pray that all my preconceived notions about this world are destroyed and that I will never be the same again.” I pray that for every person on this trip.  Every person came on this trip for different reasons. [..]

“One of my close friends is an amazing photographer. We have got to use him for our wedding pictures,” I said confidently to Amy as we were sitting down to do some wedding planning.

“Well, one of my best friends, Kate, is an amazing photographer and I’ve always wanted to use her,” she snapped back.

Uh oh. After looking at both of their websites, we were still in a gridlock. We were “over-blessed.” In the end, I deferred to my beautiful bride to be (lesson I have quickly learned) and let her make the decision. We would use my close friend for the wedding and her friend Kate for the engagement pictures since she wanted Kate to be in the wedding. [..]

Ever since I got engaged, I get asked the question, “How did you know?” quite a bit.  I usually respond with, “When you know, you know”, and while I still feel like that’s somewhat true, I have another answer.

First, let me throw out my disclaimer – To the best of my knowledge, I have never been married a day in my life.  Likewise, I claim to know nothing on how to have a healthy marriage, although I am getting counsel and reading books on that.  This is purely my opinion.

Now that that’s out of the way, here’s how I knew. [..]