A circus performer named Blondin stretched a long cable across Niagara Falls. During high winds and without a safety net, this man would walk, prance and dance across the wire. He then asked the crowd gathered, “Do you believe I can walk a tight rope across the Falls?” They all replied, “Yes.” They had already seen him do it.

Then he pushed a wheel barrow on a tight rope across Niagara Falls. When he completed the feat, he asked the onlookers, “Do you believe I can walk a tight rope across the Falls pushing a wheel barrow?” To that they replied unanimously, “Yes.” Because they saw him do that too.

Finally, a buddy of the tight rope walker climbs into the wheel barrow and the tight rope walker pushes him across the Falls. Wow, what a daring feat! When they finished, the tight rope walker asked the crowd, “Do you believe I can walk a tight rope across the Falls pushing a wheel barrow with a person in it?” To that they exclaimed, “Yes!” For they were now believers and had seen him do it!

Then he looked at the crowd and asked, “Ok, Who’s next?”

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Two weeks ago I took a little trip by myself to a cabin in East Tennessee. I wanted to get away and do some reading and spend some time alone with God. I spent some time in the sun and also reading and it was a great recharge, but an encounter with God in the middle of the kitchen floor is what I will always remember.

I started to get honest with God about some things. I wanted to know why my prayers weren’t being answered, why my heart was still being broken, why I have so much uncertainty about my job and why I couldn’t get a definite answer on anything. It was a real pity party and I was the party planner.

I felt the question, “Do you trust me?”. Yes, yes of course I do. “No… do you trust the plans I have for you?”. Yes…I do. I don’t know what they are, but I trust you. “Will you follow me where I lead?”. Right then and there I knew I had come to a crossroads. I decided then that I was either going to stand up from the kitchen floor and live my life for myself and leave behind all this suffering and uncertainty of my life or I was going to stand up and know without a doubt that I would follow Christ wherever he leads.

To be honest, it wasn’t an automatic decision. I wish I could be the perfect Christian and tell you that I knew immediately. No, it hurt to say “Lord, wherever you lead…I will follow. I surrender my life and career to you.”

That was on a Friday. On Monday, I lost my job.

I wish I could tell you I knew where this wheelbarrow is going, but I am not the one pushing it. I do know this though. Below me is a deep valley of doubt, depression and fear and I am safely above it in the arms of a Savior.

“Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” – Hebrews 11:1

I just finished reading Matthew Paul Turner’s book, Churched. He tells the story of his childhood growing up in a fundamentalist Baptist church and school. First, I have to tell the author something. You better be glad you are older than me and beat me to this book, because if you didn’t write it I would have!

I related to almost every story in this book. I felt the uneasiness Turner feels growing up trying to “win” souls for Jesus all the while trying to live the perfect life so we won’t be punished. (In Turner’s case, hoping his mom wouldn’t die in a car accident because he sinned)

Stories from his school days also echoed my experiences. I still remember the time in 2nd grade when I cheated on the spelling test bonus word. It was “firefighter.” I knew I had all the other ones correct, but wasn’t sure on this one. So I slid my spelling word list out of my book and looked at how to spell “firefighter.” I got a 105 on the test. I took my sheet, with smiley faced sticker attached, to my mom who was waiting in the car to pick me up. For some reason, I still have no idea why but I imagine it had to do with God killing us all on the way home, I told her that I cheated. That didn’t go over well. The next day, I was crying in my teachers arms telling her that I had cheated on the word “firefighter.” My 105 was crossed out and I only got a 100. My sticker was also taken away.

This book had me laughing out loud at some of the experiences the author had. Everyone’s journey is different, but I felt a connection with this story. I vividly remember the “wheat and the tear” preachers that came through my church and knew it was time for the entire congregation to get saved again. I remember the music minister calling a meeting with me to tell me that I wasn’t allowed to hang out at youth group hangouts at his house because he could tell by looking at me that I wasn’t living “right.”

As you can tell, this book took me down memory road, but it also allowed me to get a better sense of my own journey. How I got to where I am and how thankful I am that I found out who God really is to me. Also, the style of writing in this book draws you in from page 1 and you can clearly picture every situation that is presented. It was a nice break from the usual Christian(ish) books that we tend to find ourselves reading.

From burning CD’s for Jesus (I’m still happy I burned New Kids on the Block) to walking door to door to tell people they are going to hell, Turner goes from the a mess of rules and regulations to falling in love with Jesus. I recommend this book to anyone, but especially for those who grow up “Churched.” It offers a humorous look into one person’s childhood and transition from a “God of Punishment” to a “God of Love.”

Also, even though I have yet to met the author, I do go to church with him and that’s always pretty cool. I still can’t believe Pete doesn’t have highlights…